Friday, January 23, 2009

Stress eating.........this is my whole problem in a nutshell

Stress and Weight Gain: How Stress Can Affect Your Weight

Can Stress Make You Fat?

By Elizabeth Scott, M.S., About.com

Updated: October 3, 2007

About.com Health's Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board

There are several ways in which stress can contribute to weight gain. One has to do with cortisol, a stress hormone. When we’re under stress, the fight or flight response is triggered in our bodies, leading to the release of various hormones.

Whether we're stressed because of constant, crazy demands at work or we're really in danger, our bodies respond like we're about to be harmed and need to fight for our lives (or run like heck). To answer this need, we experience a burst of energy, shifts in metabolism and blood flow, and other changes.

If you remain in this state for a prolonged amount of time due to chronic stress, your health becomes at risk. Aside from a host of other dangers, chronic stress can also cause weight gain -- which is why some products like Cortislim are marketed as diet aids.

Chronic stress and cortisol can contribute to weight gain in the following ways:

    Metabolism -- Do you feel like you're prone to putting on more weight when you're stressed, even if you're eating the same amount of food as you always have? Too much cortisol can slow your metabolism, causing more weight gain than you would normally experience. This also makes dieting more difficult.

    Cravings -- OK, you're stressed. Do you reach for a nice salad or a pint of Ben & Jerry's? I'll bet on the latter. People experiencing chronic stress tend to crave more fatty, salty and sugary foods. This includes sweets, processed food and other things that aren’t as good for you. These foods are typically less healthy and lead to increased weight gain.

    Blood Sugar -- Prolonged stress can alter your blood sugar levels, causing mood swings, fatigue, and conditions like hyperglycemia. Too much stress has even been linked to metabolic syndrome, a cluster of health concerns that can lead to greater health problems, like heart attacks and diabetes.

    Fat Storage -- Excessive stress even affects where we tend to store fat. Higher levels of stress are linked to greater levels of abdominal fat. Unfortunately, abdominal fat is not only aesthetically undesirable, it’s linked with greater health risks than fat stored in other areas of the body.

Stress and weight gain are connected in other ways:

    Emotional Eating -- Increased levels of cortisol can not only make you crave unhealthy food, but excess nervous energy can often cause you to eat more than you normally would. How many times have you found yourself scouring the kitchen for a snack, or absently munching on junk food when you’re stressed, but not really hungry? More on what causes emotional eating.

    Fast Food -- Experts believe that one of the big reasons we’re seeing more obesity in our society these days is that people are too stressed and busy to make healthy dinners at home, often opting to get fast food a the nearest drive-thru instead.

    Too Busy to Exercise -- With all the demands on your schedule, exercise may be one of the last things on your to-do list. If so, you’re not alone. Americans live a more sedentary lifestyle than we have in past generations, yet our minds seem to be racing from everything we have to do. Unfortunately, from sitting in traffic, clocking hours at our desks, and plopping in front of the TV in exhaustion at the end of the day, exercise often goes by the wayside.

Fortunately, there are things you can do to reverse the pattern of weight gain and actually reduce your stress level and waistline at the same time.


Wednesday, January 14, 2009

letter to my therapist

Dear Sara,
I am trying hard to understand how I feel these days. I feel as tho I am in a little world all by myself with people coming and going around me. People telling me what to do, what to eat and hassling me. I am taking Xanax when I work, not much when I am home so I don'r think I am zoning out on Xanax. I've been taking this drug for years and it's not worth it to make myself more on the sidelines of life than I am.
This is supposed to be the section of the year in which I start to feel better. I felt better when I was hopeful enough to start a diet which I do every New Year's but after a few days I fell off the waggon and never climbed up on it again. And my mood and motivation is such that all I want to do is sleep when no one is around to bother me and sit in the recliner and watch reality shows. I don't even spend much time here as I would normally.
It's like I feel like saying something to somebody and since I just don't talk anymore without thinking thru what I want to say, I go thru it in my mind (especially if it is a complaint or a topic I might talk about) and realize what kind of answer I might get and decide to say nothing.
eg: what sense does it make to complain about my situation. Anything that can be done for me is being done. Pills can only take you so far. My weight situation is my fault, if I mention this I open myself up to a can of worms which I don't feel like dealing with. No sense saying I don't want to go to work because I out to be glad in this economy that I have a job to go to at all and lets face it if I didn't have that structure I wouldn't get up at all or shower or even talk to anybody.
It just seems to me that its getting harder and harder to deal with the aggravations of life so I run away from them in my mind. I have no hope anymore that things will get any better, just worse and I haven't got the energy or motivation to climb out of the hole I am in.
I guess I am just resigned to living as I am. I feel like even if I was 120lbs, feeling great and having a good life I would still go to bed and sleep until someone turned me out on the floor. I don't think there's any hope for me at all. I think there's nothing left in anybody's bag of tricks that will give me the energy or optimism to cope with the stuff I have to cope with. Far better to just shut up and let what everybody else does go past me, as long as they leave me alone when they do it. Such a sorry sack of shit I am

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Don't know what is wrong with me

I ate everything under the sun today. I feel very depresed. I did 20min on the bike this am. Here is what I ate (see if I can remember everything 8-(

breakfast: SF bar
later on: 1/2 can fruit cocktail and about a cup of yogurt
+ some cornbread lying around, 2 pieces, buttered and microwaved
+Lean Cuisine lasagna dinner
+ salad
+ another SF bar
+ rest of fruit cocktail and about 1 c. yoghurt
+ 4 slices of some glutin-free bread that my brother left behind, with butter
+ about 2-3 c of mini-vanilla wafers
+ one ice cream sandwich
+ one left-over hot dog (the meat only, not the whole thing)
+ i can of sugared soda
There's probably some stuff I left out

I just feel depressed, left out, run over, ignored, fat and ugly and guilty that even tho I know all this, I haven't got the self-control to stay away from stuffing my face when I am not hungry.
Normal people eat to satisfy hunger, I eat to fill up the big hole in myself that says I am worthless.
No amount of motivational self-talk works. No image of a thin me wearing fashionable clothing and nice shoes etc. helps. When you are depressed you are depressed.
Just a few days ago I was gung-ho to make a big difference in my life. Shortest diet I ever fucked up. Usually lasts longer than a few days. I am so useless. Can't even take control of my own life

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Didn't do so good tonite

I have only started my diet last Friday and did pretty good until this evening. I had a trigger and when I get upset about something I have to deal with that I can't handle I turn to food. This time it was my grandson, who bless his heart and I love him better than anything on this earth, was really acting up. He is 4 and mildly autistic and today I just didn't have the patience and little kids pick up on this and they act out. Oh I should say that my daughter and grandson moved back in with me about 2 months ago.

Anyway having said all that, after I had a perfectly good supper, I ate a Slimfast bar, then a bag of popcorn, and then was going to eat some vanilla wafers, but I went and ate another Slimfast bar. After this I feel so guilty and wish I knew how to deal with my emotions in some other way besides eating. It's always been like this and skinny ppl don't understand that trying to distract myself with other things just don't cut it.

What I just ate was a small drop in the bucket of what I would eat at night if I wasn't on a diet so if you compare the two, the 220 + 220 + 250 cals isn't much (650 cals) However I did ride my bike out od guilt and drank a glass of water. I will take the battle back up tomorrow.

Monday, January 5, 2009

I cheated today (but it was worth it...)

I worked today and forgot my Slimfast bar but for lunch I had one of those 90 cal diet bars, you know the little skinny one-bite ones made by Quaker Oats.
Breakfast was my usual shake but I added 1/2 banana
Supper: I had my left over Chinese food left from the day before and here's where I cheated:
DH made pinto beans and cornbread and I just had to have some. I ate 2 small wedges but I tell myself my scanty lunch made up for it, lolz. He also had some collard greens and pork chops (fried, I didn't eat)
snacks: 1 c lowfat vanilla yoghurt, too lazy to put any fruit with it
later on, one Slimfast bar

I am doing pretty good for now but that's the way it always is for me. I start out with a good gung-ho attitude and it gradually fades away. I am just hoping I can keep it up long enough to make a difference. I am making myself wait until Friday to weigh myself. The first loss is always water weight but as long as the needle on the scale goes down, it's all good to me.

I don't do good with water. Maybe 2-3 cups, I usually drink a lot of other liquids but I know I should make room for a gallon of water and squeeze it in

My exercise program is going ok, still 15 min am, 30 min pm. On my days off I will do 30 min in the am, when I don't have to rush out to work 8^D

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Second day



breakfast: Slimfast shake
lunch: Slimfast bar
supper: Chinese veg w/chicken which I divided for tomorrow. I cheated and had some rice, maybe a cupfull? 8^0
6pm: big lettuce salad, I had nothing but lite Italian dressing on it
8:30:1/2 Slimfast bar
10pm: youghurt, 200 cals
11pm: other 1/2 SF bar

Waters: 2-3+

Exercise: 15min cycling in am, 30 min. in pm

Made it thru first day


breakfast: one SF shake
lunch: Slimfast bar
supper: 1 lg. house salad w/grilled chicken

night-time snacks: 1 Slimfast bar and one small apple

I only got 4 waters in not counting the other liquids I drank thru the day

Exercise: Rode my bike 15 min in am, 30 min in evening

It's the New Year.....time to diet, lol

I decided to set up another Blogger account so that I would have somewhere to put my Slimfast diary. At least I know how this goes and I know what's enabled. Many spaces don't allow much in the way of pimping your space out, making it look nice.

I'm gonna go and get the few things I posted at Slimfast later. DD wants to use the comp now